The Perfect Lie We Tell Ourselves

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The perfect lie, this is something we tell ourselves probably every day. Last week at church, the young women watched a video called ‘The Perfect Lie’, On our way home we discuss things that we learned and went over during church, my daughter didn’t say anything special when I asked her about how her classes went on the way home.

It was shared in the branch Facebook page, So I watched and it was like a smack in the face. It was one of those things I knew and we hear about but this was the right time and was just what I needed to hear.


This video is from a conference called Hope Works from a few months ago, The talk was about Tiffany saw perfection in her future as a wife, mother, and overachiever. But as checklists grew longer and expectations grew harder to meet, Tiffany felt exhausted and broken. Something I am pretty sure we all have done and felt at one point as a parent.

I fell for The Perfect Lie

During the video The Perfect Lie, Tiffany explains that when she was 15 she had her list of wants for her life all figured out things like

  • Successfully graduated from college.
  • Married to the man of my dreams.
  • Be the mother to 4–5 kids, each two years apart.
  • Living in my beautiful custom home.
  • Running a successful business from home (just when the kids sleep)

She also said

If I’m more patient, more forgiving, more loving, more charitable, more prayerful (and the list could go on and on), I can be like Christ. Christlike is the goal. Sounds good, right? Except it’s not. It’s the perfect lie. It’s Satan’s equation that he dupes us into living.

For me I can not tell you how many times I feel this way, ya know the Me + More = Christlike. I often feel the more I do this or that the better christian, parent, wife or daughter I would be come more Christlike.

Over the holidays I really felt like this. If I make the cooking from scratch and not a mix or even buying them I am depriving my kids of knowing what they mean to me. Or making 10 different kinds of candy people will think I am not a good person and I don’t care. This is one thing that totally hit close to home.  At the end of the day it hit me I think I knew that using a tube of cookies or only making a couple different kinds of candy would be perfectly fine.

Satan’s Equation


Truth is as I watched this I realized I was just wearing myself thin and putting the ‘nonsense’ things ahead of the important things. The playing games with the kids, studying the Scriptures, doing the things that will really make me happy.


As I was watching this it reinforced that Satan is telling me the perfect lie, and sadly I was buying in to it. I think I knew about this but it never really knew in my heart. I think often times we do hear something so much we know the truth. Just remember that feeling it in our heart and soul is totally a different cup of water.

Watching this helped me realize with out Christ the main focus of my life. This perfect lie will keep me from going in the direction I want to go.

Nowhere in the scriptures does Christ say that our efforts are inadequate. Never does He say, “If you don’t work hard enough, you’ll never be enough.”

No. His truth and His invitation is “Come unto me, for my grace is sufficient.”

Christ’s truth, I discovered, is more like this equation:

Tiffany taught me so much and reminded me how important I am just for being me. I don’t need to be perfect and keep adding more to my plate to make it seem like I am.

When we put Christ in His proper place, when we come to Him and get to know Him, there is nothing that He can’t equal us to. With Christ, we can be kinder. With Christ, we will feel loved. With Christ, we will always have a friend. With Christ, we will be happy.

For with Christ we are enough. We are powerful. We are more.

I have decided to really study the scriptures, more humble and heartfelt prayers, learning to say no and doing what I can to grow closer to Christ instead of being exactly like him.



You can read the full transcript (quotes and 2 images are from this article) of The Perfect Lie you can find it on the site.

Learn more about Tiffany’s journey of faith and hope on Mormon Channel.

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